Monday, December 24, 2007

What I should have told him

J: Message me as soon as you get your new phone.

YS: What for?

J: We’re still friends, right?

YS: But I have lots of friends already. I have so many friends. I don’t keep in touch enough with the friends I have. But what I don’t have – what I have never really had – is a boyfriend. A person I love who actually loves me back. And sometimes it gets so lonely, sometimes the hollow is so black inside my heart I could scream. A friend is a palliative. A friend is like drinking water when you have cancer. It’s good for you, but you know you’re still going to die.

So unless you can find someone whom I can love and who’ll love me back, both in our stupid illogical ways, I don’t need to be friends with you.

I'm not actually feeling that emo. I just don't like being rejected, even for justifiable reasons.

UPDATE: Maybe it would've been snappier to say, "Why should I even try to be Platonic with you? It'd hurt." Ah, l'esprit d'escalier.

No comments: