es muss sein!

Dear Father et al,

Simon Jackson is amazed that you don't think I've better things to do on vacation than render expense accounts to you. Still, this is the same bloke who asks me not to call mobile numbers on his land line, because they cost so much, so you may take that with as large a pinch of salt as you like.

Since Sunday's technically the first day of the week, and Monday's a day for office work, I'm giving you expenses up till Saturday. I've only used credit cards twice, by the way: Mum's card once to withdraw money because I'd forgotten to put any in my wallet (there are HSBC ATMs *everywhere* here; real reverse colonialism) and just before that, with my own credit card, when I bought my 7-day public transport saver card.

Anyhow, let's have a run-down:

*Travel*

Tuesday 04/10:
Heathrow Express = £14
1 X Tube = £2.30

Wednesday 05/10:
2 X Tube = £4.60
\r\nThursday 06/10:\r\nOystercard 7-day saver = £21.40\r\n \r\nFriday 07/10: £0\r\n \r\nSaturday 08/10: £0\r\n \r\nTotal = £42.30\r\n \r\n*Sightseeing and Miscellaneous*\r\n \r\nTuesday 04/10:\r\npublic phones to get hold of Simon = 60p\r\nFreud House = £3\r\n \r\nWednesday 05/10:\r\nMap of London = £3\r\npublic phones to get hold of gay youth groups = £1\r\ntoiletries from Boots = £8.11\r\nBritish Museum = FREE!!!\r\nBritish Museum Walking Tour = £4.50\r\nBloomsbury Walking Tour, detailing the scandalous lives of intellectuals "who lived in squares and loved in triangles" = £4.50",1]
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Thursday 06/10:
Oystercard 7-day saver = £21.40

Friday 07/10: £0

Saturday 08/10: £0

Total = £42.30

*Sightseeing and Miscellaneous*

Tuesday 04/10:
public phones to get hold of Simon = 60p
Freud House = £3

Wednesday 05/10:
Map of London = £3
public phones to get hold of gay youth groups = £1
toiletries from Boots = £8.11
British Museum = FREE!!!
British Museum Walking Tour = £4.50
Bloomsbury Walking Tour, detailing the scandalous lives of intellectuals "who lived in squares and loved in triangles" = £4.50
\r\n \r\nThursday 06/10: \r\npublic phone to get hold of youth group again = 40p\r\nfabulous walking tour of gay London administered by gay youth after the meeting = FREE!!!\r\n \r\nFriday 07/10:\r\nWalking tour of South Bank (Self-guided)= FREE!!! \r\nOne hour at the Design Museum, looking at the stuff in the gift shop because we\'re too stingy to pay to go in = FREE!!!\r\nTate Modern = FREE!!! Suggested donation my Aunt Matilda!!!\r\nClubbing at Popstarz = £8\r\nCoat-check girl = £1\r\nCoca-cola for sugar and caffeine to keep me awake = £2.30\r\n \r\nSaturday 08/10:\r\nall-male "Measure for Measure" in the Globe Theatre standing stalls = £5\r\nPleasuredome sauna = £10\r\n \r\nTotal = £51.41\r\n \r\n",1]
);
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Thursday 06/10:
public phone to get hold of youth group again = 40p
fabulous walking tour of gay London administered by gay youth after the meeting = FREE!!!

Friday 07/10:
Walking tour of South Bank (Self-guided)= FREE!!!
One hour at the Design Museum, looking at the stuff in the gift shop because we're too stingy to pay to go in = FREE!!!
Tate Modern = FREE!!! Suggested donation my Aunt Matilda!!!
Clubbing at Popstarz = £8
Coat-check girl = £1
Coca-cola for sugar and caffeine to keep me awake = £2.30

Saturday 08/10:
all-male "Measure for Measure" in the Globe Theatre standing stalls = £5
Pleasuredome sauna = £10

Total = £51.41

*Food*\r\nTuesday 04/10:\r\nBreakfast platter: sausage, bacon, fried br\r\nead with egg, fried tomatoes, baked beans, and black puddings. (They resemble little double chocolate biscuits with gristle insides, and they only taste of anything on the outside).\r\n\r\nBlueberries = £1.50\r\nSalmon and fried rice from Simon\'s fridge = £0\r\nAlso soymilk and cranberry-blackcurrant juice = £0\r\n \r\nWednesday 05/10:\r\nOrganic peanut butter sandwich from Simon\'s larder = £0\r\nCornish pasty (ugh) = 3.50\r\nBlackberry-apple lollipop from Visit London office = 60p\r\nHot dog from Iranian man outside British Museum = £2.50\r\nToffee apple from Sainsbury\'s = 52p\r\nYoghurt with vanilla crunchy bits = 59p\r\n",1]
);
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*Food*
Tuesday 04/10:
Breakfast platter: sausage, bacon, fried br ead with egg, fried tomatoes, baked beans, and black puddings. (They resemble little double chocolate biscuits with gristle insides, and they only taste of anything on the outside).
Blueberries = £1.50
Salmon and fried rice from Simon's fridge = £0
Also soymilk and cranberry-blackcurrant juice = £0

Wednesday 05/10:
Organic peanut butter sandwich from Simon's larder = £0
Cornish pasty (ugh) = 3.50
Blackberry-apple lollipop from Visit London office = 60p
Hot dog from Iranian man outside British Museum = £2.50
Toffee apple from Sainsbury's = 52p
Yoghurt with vanilla crunchy bits = 59p
Simon\'s unmarinated beef with fried plantains and gooseberry preserves = £0\r\n \r\nThursday 06/10:\r\nLoads and loads of organic peanut butter and gooseberry preserves sandwiches while I used the Internet in the house = £0\r\n\r\nScampi and chips with vinegar= £4.30\r\nClementines and chocolate digestives with passionfruit cordial = £0 courtesy of NRG gay youth counselling servies, heheheheheh\r\n \r\nFriday 07/10:\r\nBurmese meatballs with spring roll and banana fritters = £5.90 lunch special\r\nSlice of fridge cake, composed of crumbled digestives, maraschino cherries, raisins, almonds chocolate and butter melted then allowed to congeal from the Tower of London Café = £2.50\r\n\r\nOrange ice lolly = £1\r\nChicken kebab in pita in Leceister Square = £3.80\r\nChewing gum while walking home to save on cabfare = 60p\r\n \r\nSaturday 08/10:\r\nHot coriander and carrot soup with egg and cress sandwiches during intermission at the Globe Theatre = £5\r\n",1]
);
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Simon's unmarinated beef with fried plantains and gooseberry preserves = £0

Thursday 06/10:
Loads and loads of organic peanut butter and gooseberry preserves sandwiches while I used the Internet in the house = £0
Scampi and chips with vinegar= £4.30
Clementines and chocolate digestives with passionfruit cordial = £0 courtesy of NRG gay youth counselling servies, heheheheheh

Friday 07/10:
Burmese meatballs with spring roll and banana fritters = £5.90 lunch special
Slice of fridge cake, composed of crumbled digestives, maraschino cherries, raisins, almonds chocolate and butter melted then allowed to congeal from the Tower of London Café = £2.50
Orange ice lolly = £1
Chicken kebab in pita in Leceister Square = £3.80
Chewing gum while walking home to save on cabfare = 60p

Saturday 08/10:
Hot coriander and carrot soup with egg and cress sandwiches during intermission at the Globe Theatre = £5
Cookie = £1.50\r\nChicken norjahaini with onion and coriander rice from Thames Tandoori at Waterloo Station = £10.90\r\nBrandy at Simon\'s = £0\r\nTotal = £48.71\r\nWeekly Total = £142.42 = S$421.86 at current exchange rates\r\nHope that\'s satisfactory, considering how I\'m deliberately avoiding going to attractions that charge admission (Madame Tussaud\'s? We went there ten years ago; the statues don\'t get older, do they?).\r\n And I\'ve still got £180 in notes in my suitcase that I haven\'t spent yet. Will probably be going to the Midlands for a bit to visit people, so might not be converting that.\r\n\r\nMust try to sponge off Simon more. Wonder if he\'ll notice if I start selling his furniture?\r\nSincerely,\r\nB).\r\n \r\n\r\n",0]
);
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Cookie = £1.50
Chicken norjahaini with onion and coriander rice from Thames Tandoori at Waterloo Station = £10.90
Brandy at Simon's = £0
Total = £48.71
Weekly Total = £142.42 = S$421.86 at current exchange rates
Hope that's satisfactory, considering how I'm deliberately avoiding going to attractions that charge admission (Madame Tussaud's? We went there ten years ago; the statues don't get older, do they?). And I've still got £180 in notes in my suitcase that I haven't spent yet. Will probably be going to the Midlands for a bit to visit people, so might not be converting that.
Must try to sponge off Simon more. Wonder if he'll notice if I start selling his furniture?
Sincerely,
B).